Disclaimer: This is a review for people who are not necessarily Hideo Kojima fans. Death Stranding is, unequivocally, the worst video game I've ever played.
The first thing you need to know is that this is a $60 AAA game released in 2019 in which you spend most of your time managing weight and trying not to fall down.
I would have considered that a rip-off twenty years ago. I don't have the vocabulary to describe what I consider it now. The mechanics are utterly arbitrary. Some people have referred to Death Stranding as a 100-hour walking sim. But 100-hour falling sim would be more accurate. The infuriating part is that the weight/balance mechanics add nothing to what might have been a great story in a beautiful, disturbing and completely unique game world. Indeed, those and any other positive elements of Death Stranding are rendered moot by the utter tedium of playing it.
I know that more efficient means of transport are eventually available through progression. But making the latter parts of a game tolerable by making its early parts insufferable is a valid business model for a free-to-play game on iOS, not a AAA game on an 8th-gen console.
And it actually gets worse. Much. Worse.
Imagine a frustratingly tedious part from any game that you've played in the past. Maybe it's the Water Temple in Ocarina of Time or The Library in Halo. Now imagine playing through those with a baby crying at the top of its lungs. Because that's a mechanic in Death Stranding. Yup. A group of ostensibly qualified and intelligent men and women sat together in a room and thought, "Hey, you know what's missing from this game that's already super-annoying to play? Babies screaming!" It's absolutely baffling how this became a thing. It's an April Fool's prank that someone forgot to remove before release day.
I did not finish this game. Not even close. On release day, I wrote this review in my head. I've given Death Stranding another chance, multiple times. And each and every time I do this, I come to the same conclusion: Death Stranding is a chore to play. The story is great. The world is surreal and breathtaking. But actually playing the game is just not fun.
I
want games to be challenging. I
want to get stuck on a puzzle or wipe multiple times on a difficult boss. Elements like this add immeasurable value to beating a game. But triumphing over falling down? Spending 90% of a modern game walking around? Being quick enough with the mute button that you don't have to hear a wailing infant? Where is the value in those achievements and why would anyone be proud of achieving them?
I know this review is going to get a lot of hate and of course there are people who love Death Stranding. These are good things. The industry needs diversity, lest GameStop's shelves be filled with CoD or Fortnite clones. But for me, Death Stranding is "different" to a fault. Its mechanics are arbitrary and frustrating and could be removed almost entirely without hurting the narrative. If you love Hideo Kojima's other games, you might be able to get through the tedium of this one. But if you're not a fan, this is probably not a game you're going to love (or finish).
.5